You Know Your an Alcoholic When

[peresvet24]

• You lose arguments with inanimate objects.

• You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

• Job interfering with your drinking.

• Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.

• Career won't progress beyond Senator of Massachusetts.

• The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.

• Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.

• 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!

• Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem!

• You can focus better with one eye closed.

• The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.

• Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.

• Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!

• Mosquitoes get a buzz after attacking you

• At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."

• Your idea of cutting back is less salt.

• You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmm.

• The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...

 

[mahoney0_00_3]

I had to go to a aa meeting for my drivers lic and there was a guy there that so full of beer that on a highway he thought he would throw-up and feel better going 65 mph so he opened the door and throw-up and fell out of the car and ran over his legs(both of them)the best part was his wife was sleeping next to him (more like drunk and passed out)the car went off the road and came to rest in a snow bank and she was unharmed-the judge ordered him to go to 1000 AA meeting in 1000 days and took his lic for 10 years---and when you think you are having a really bad day, just think there is someone out thereuke: having a worse one!